1. One of the key steps to overcoming anger is to identify the object of your anger. Many people who struggle with chronic anger aren’t even sure what they’re angry about. When you identify what you’re angry about you can begin the process of dealing with it.
2. One of the goals of an angry person can be to draw attention to themselves. They often feel that negative attention is better than no attention at all. If you don’t feel loved or needed, this may be a root cause of your anger.
3. Accept the fact that most things in the world are out of your control. If you try to continually control your family, friends or circumstances you will find the result frustrating.
4. The root of your anger may lie in a lack of forgiveness. If you’ve never forgiven someone who’s hurt you, you’re caught in a vicious trap that will ultimately destroy you.
5. Many who struggle with anger hate themselves. Self-hatred can be used as a tool to control your emotions. You may need to learn new skills to control your emotions in a positive way.
6. You may be angry about things your family or friends have done to you in the past, even decades ago. This is called residual anger. It is possible to resolve this anger and move on with your life, but you must be willing to spend time identifying the root of your problem and choosing to forgive those who have hurt you.
7. There are some legitimate physical causes for anger. If you suspect your problem may be related to a chemical imbalance in your body, be evaluated by a qualified psychiatrist.
8. In truth, no one can “make you angry,” even though they can provoke you. You can control your response to people and circumstances.
9. There is a place for “righteous anger,” when one of God’s principles is violated. Remember, being angry is not a sin, but what we do with our anger may be. Scripture does admonish us to “not let the sun go down on our anger” though. In other words, when you feel angry, it is important to deal with it and move past it as soon as possible.
10. If you or a family member is struggling with anger issues, they’re not likely to go away by themselves. It is necessary to identify the cause of the anger and take proactive steps to resolve it.