We admitted that we were powerless over our dependencies and that our lives had become unmanageable.
We’ll do almost anything to gain the love we need (which may have been denied us as children or in our marriage). Maybe the pain and sadness over our powerlessness to attract the love we desperately need drive us to find a way to deaden the pain.
Leah was a plain girl with a beautiful younger sister and a scheming father. Her father tricked Jacob into marrying Leah. He then allowed Jacob also to have her sister, Rachel. “So Jacob slept with Rachel, too, and he loved her much more than Leah. . . . When the Lord saw that Leah was unloved, he enabled her to have children, but Rachel could not conceive. So Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben, for she said, ‘The Lord has noticed my misery, and now my husband will love me.’ She soon became pregnant again and gave birth to another son. She named him Simeon, for she said, ‘The Lord heard that I was unloved and has given me another son.’ Then she became pregnant a third time and gave birth to another son. She named him Levi, for she said, ‘Surely this time my husband will feel affection for me, since I have given him three sons!‘”(Genesis 29:30-34).
We may be powerless to make someone love us, spending our lives trying to produce something to make us worthy of their love. This need might gnaw away at us and lead to relapse when the pain becomes overwhelming. When people won’t love us, we can learn to draw upon the love of God. He loves us as we are.
Drawing on God’s unconditional love and grace can fill our need to be wanted.
Taken from The Life Recovery Devotional copyright © 1991 by Stephen Arterburn and David Stoop. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved.