Leading Worship At Home

Steve Arterburn

Men, we were created for worship. It enhances and expresses intimacy with the Lord, and brings both Him and us great pleasure. Yet many men tighten up just saying grace before dinner. Public worship’even if it’s only in front of your family may cause you to feel as nervous as a third baseman charging a short-hopper with the game on the line in the bottom of the ninth.

Most of us have been there. And most of us have also blamed it on our lack of experience praying in public. Yet for the vast majority of men, that’s not really the issue. The real issue is that you don’t have enough experience praying in private! Deepening your private life of worship will naturally embolden your public life of worship. And the first place it’ll bring benefit is in your ability to provide better spiritual leadership in your home.

Guys, no one in your home should be more comfortable with worship and prayer than you. Your family absolutely needs you to lead them. Feeling funny about it is no excuse.

Start small, but be courageous and committed to growth. You simply cannot and must not ‘chicken out’ when your family looks to you for spiritual leadership. The Holy Spirit is waiting for you to step up to the plate, and He’ll meet you there. That’s a promise from God.

It’s Big Business

Steve Arterburn

Guys, when you think of big business in America, what comes to mind? Computers, oil, professional sports, the automotive industry? How about pornography? If it doesn’t, it should.

That’s because pornography is now considered to be more than a $10 billion-a-year business in America. Yes, you heard me correctly; I said billion! This isn’t exactly a new development either. As far back as 1985, the Ladies Home Journal gave an excellent expos’ regarding the extent of that industry’s sprawling empire. Listen to these findings:

         Americans spent far more on pornographic material than the $6.2 billion grossed by all three major television networks’ABC, NBC, and CBS’combined.

         More than 20 million Americans buy sexually oriented magazines every month.

         Fifteen percent of all videos sold in the United States are sexually explicit in nature.

The problem’s not getting better either. In fact, between 1985 and now, pornography’s become more accepted by mainstream culture, and more easily accessible to a wider audience’largely through growing mediums like cable and satellite television, and the internet. In other words, pornography possesses a large and ever-growing claim upon the inner lives, the leisure time, and the discretionary income of multiplied millions of Americans.

If you’re one of these people, you need to find a way to stop. This isn’t a harmless pastime. You’re destroying yourself, your loved ones, and contributing to our society’s undoing. Seek and secure whatever help you need, like our Every Man’s Battle workshop, but please stop!

Clarifying Male Sacrifice

Steve Arterburn

Guys, let’s get practical about sacrificial thinking. If we’re to love and serve our wives in the manner God desires, we must understand at least the following three things going on:

 

First, sacrificial thinking isn’t giving your wife everything she wants. It’s making sure her essence is expressed and honored equally alongside yours, in the same way the white stripe is expressed equally with the red on a candy cane.

Second, sacrificial thinking is more than taking her thoughts into consideration. It’s taking those thoughts and putting them into play with as much emphasis and care as you give your own thoughts’even if some of her thought processes may not make sense to you as a guy. If you don’t act upon them, there’ll be no oneness. She’ll feel trampled and disregarded, no matter how often you say, ‘But darling, I listened to you. I just felt my way was better.’

Third, you must develop your own style of carrying out this sacrificial thinking’a style that’s customized to the character and needs of your particular marital situation. You may not always agree with my answers. That’s fine. Answers aren’t nearly as important as the way of coming to them. Your wife is different from you wife’s best friend, and you’re different from me. Therefore, the answers may be different. But, men, the use of the servant mind-set must always be consistent among all of us if we wish to love our wives as ourselves.