God is protecting you from yourself.
Have you ever considered what temptations, trials or tribulations God has already protected you from? Ones you never even felt or experienced. Have you reflected on the ones where He delivered you from the very midst? How many times has He saved you from yourself? These unseen instances are probably too great to count. The visible instances are often easy to forget. Yet we cannot underestimate His sovereignty. We cannot overestimate His love. We have His word that we’re protected. By His outstretched arm and mighty hand He protects His people. It may not seem like it today, but He is busy at the work of protecting you. That is not to say he won’t keep us from harm or even death, but it is to say his sovereignty is implicit in it.
Instead of spending time asking questions about why He won’t deliver you from your sin or circumstance, reframe your perspective and attempt to see where He is already saving you from the magnitude of it.
When I reflect on my sexual addiction and all the damage I did, I can also see how much worse it could have been. There were so many opportunities for me to blow up my life with more magnitude and collateral damage and God was faithful to protect me. From myself. In a sense, he let me enter into painful circumstances to avoid even more painful circumstances.
Perhaps even today God is protecting us from ourselves. Let us be thankful.
Here are a few verses to investigate around this subject:
|2 Sam 22:31, Psalm 46:1, Psalm 62:7, Exodus 33:19-23, Psalm 136:12
Don’t take a summer vacation from your recovery!
This is the time when it feels easy to kick back and relax, to just breathe and enjoy life a little bit. And we should do that to a certain extent. Family vacations, the Disney experience, cruises and family and friends around the bar-b-q all have that “take a break” feel to them. But you can’t afford to take a break from your recovery.
I hear it frequently from guys who have been on the journey a while. They just want a break, to relax, to not have to think about integrity and character building. And truly, I believe that day will come for you. But not yet. It will be a natural thing that happens. You’ll naturally be able to relax and take a vacation because the tools and tactics of recovery will be second nature to you. You won’t have to focus so hard and be intentional about bouncing your eyes, controlling fantasy thoughts and stopping lust in its tracks; those things will be new, healthy habits that take less energy.
So if you’re wanting that break, press in. Don’t let up now. Your life and legacy depend on it.
I’ve been thinking a little bit about the core beliefs of sexually addicted men and how skewed they are. Our actions and reactions to life are predicated on our core beliefs. If they are slightly out of whack, not grounded in biblical truth or altogether false we are sure to stay stuck. Here are 3 core beliefs I think every man must acknowledge and admit in order to see his sanctification and recovery process move forward.
1 – BELIEF: Sex is vitally important to my well-being. ADMISSION: Sex is something I’ve come to value too highly and I am willing to trust God with it.
It was a huge hurdle for me to surrender sex. I’d say I trust God with my finances, my health, my business, my kids and their health, etc. etc. But trust God with my sex? Let Him be in charge of whether or not I ever have it again? Yikes. And it was a fundamental shift that was absolutely necessary for me to find freedom. The prayer went something like this: “OK God. I’ve put too much importance on sex. But I don’t want to undervalue it either! So you be the judge and you be the determining factor. If I never have sex again; I trust you. If I have frequent sex again; I trust you. As the author of the act, I trust you”.
2 – BELIEF: If anyone knows the truth about my struggle they will reject me. ADMISSION: I have to face rejection to find freedom.
I hate rejection. Even that little tinge of rejection I feel when I’m at a summer BBQ with folks I don’t really know and it seems like I’m odd man out for the conversations going on. Yuck. Hate it. That little tinge of rejection is amplified exponentially when it comes to shameful things like my sexual struggles. I was deathly afraid of being found out. Yet being found out was the best thing that ever happened to me. Freedom is found in facing your fears. Especially rejection.
3 – BELIEF: My life goes well when I’m in control. ADMISSION: I am NOT the best CEO of my life.
This has been a tough one to learn. Over and over again. And over. Again. When I think I’m the best person to be in charge of my life something inevitably and divinely happens to remind me that its a myth. When I think I’ve got it altogether I’m kidding myself. The objective truth is that I can manage some things really well. I’m gifted in areas and can steward those gifts quite well. And the objective truth is also that when I try to manage every thing in my life, I blow it up. I am not the best CEO and that is exactly why I need a savior.
I often need a reminder of this truth; so I’ve been keeping a little note on my computer. It helps me stay grounded even as I blog.
I would love to hear what you’ve had to admit to see recovery happen in your life. I’m sure there are more than these few. Please let me know in the comments section!