Creating Your Boundaries

Steve Arterburn

Men, establishing personal boundaries is imperative to your spiritual freedom and vitality. These boundaries should be intentional and thought out ahead of time; while in the midst of temptation is no time to attempt to put them in place. They should be determined by and measured against God’s word. And finally, boundaries should be appropriately and strategically customized to your unique life situation and struggles.

 

These are some general guidelines for thinking through how you create and apply boundaries. But what concrete expression might they take in your life? Perhaps a few examples would be helpful. Perhaps your boundaries may include:

         Blocking the pay-per-view option at the hotel front desk.

         Refusing to make low-blow putdowns during marital disagreements.

         Saying ‘no’ when asked to do things on weekends that don’t involve the whole family.

         Never being alone with a woman who isn’t your wife.

         Turning the channel when there’s too much skin and too little clothing on TV ‘ even if it’s only a commercial.

         Refusing to keep self-destructive secrets from your wife.

         Never making a significant financial or family decision without first consulting your wife.

Guys, formulating and committing to personal boundaries forces you to take honest stock of your life both practically and spiritually. It means counting the cost of what it’ll take to build a solid spiritual life, and adjusting your expectations to match the reality of being God’s man.