Understanding Your Wife’s Heart: Part 4

New Life Ministries

Your wife can be your ‘comrade in arms’ if she understands the battle for sexual purity and the road you have chosen for sexual integrity. Because male sexual impurity can be unsettling, even shocking, to women, we’ve included this section of interviews with women regarding Every Man’s Battle to give you awareness of how to relate better to your wife and communicate with her in your struggle to be and stay free. Be aware there’s a natural tug-of-war in the hearts of women between pity and disgust, between mercy and judgment.

Your Weapon of Prayer

Once your husband engages in the battle for sexual integrity, here are some things you can pray for him:

1. Pray that God would keep him from wavering and stumbling. Ask God to put more light on his path and more courage in his step.

2. Pray against spiritual opposition in the form of lies. As you know, Satan will lie to him to weaken his will to win. Pray that Satan’s efforts to confuse him will be ineffective.

3. Pray against possible spiritual oppression. Ask God to release power to break any spiritual oppression over your lives and your home that has resulted from his sexual sin.

Add Mercy to Your Arsenal!
Along with prayer, there are other ways you can help him with this battle. Once he tells you he’s going cold turkey, be like a merciful vial of methadone for him. Increase your availability to him sexually, though this may be difficult for you since your husband might have told you some things that repulse you. Since your sex drive, as a woman, is tied to relationship, you may feel betrayed, just as if your husband had an actual affair.

It may help you to view this from a male’s perspective, where ‘relationship’ and ‘sex’ do not have such a tight bond. Please don’t misunderstand us. His lusting was definitely a moral betrayal, but it wasn’t necessarily a betrayal of the heart. You may still be his one and only true love, the one he could never, ever leave. He has a fractional addiction to the chemical high, but don’t assume his heart for you is untrue. Mercy is probably your best tack ‘ with accountability, of course.

Men, after attending Every Man’s Battle, we strongly encourage you to attend our marriage program at our New Life Weekend
This weekend will help your marriage to heal from the wounds of
impurity and will especially help your wife with questions that she
still may have.


Getting to the Other Side

New Life Ministries

While there may not be spiritual oppression involved in your battle, there’ll always be spiritual opposition. The enemy is constantly near your ear. He doesn’t want you to win this fight, and he knows the lies that so often break men’s confidence and their will to win. Expect to hear lies and plenty of them.
What we’ve told you is the truth There is peace and tranquility for you on the other side of this war. There is immeasurable spiritual gain. The deceiver will tell you that we are crazy and that you’ll soon be as crazy as we are if you follow our ideas.

****************************************
The challenge every man faces’
The fight every man can win!

****************************************

To help you recognize Satan’s lies when you hear them, here’s a list of some of them. (After each lie, we’ll state the actual truth.)

Satan: ‘You’re the only one dealing with this problem. If anyone never finds out, you’ll be the laughingstock of the church!


The truth:
Most men deal with this problem, so no one will laugh.

Satan: ‘You failed again. You’ll never be able to train your eyes. It’s impossible.’


The truth:
It isn’t impossible. Job trained his eyes, didn’t he? He was a man just like you.

Satan: ‘You’re being so legalistic! The law is dead and only brings death.’


The truth:
God still has standards of behavior for us, and you’re responsible to live purely by His standards.

Satan: ‘Oh, c’mon! Don’t be such a moron. This ‘habit-changing’ plan will never work.’


The truth:
The plan will work, because for most men the problem of sexual impurity is nothing more than bad choices evolving into bad habits.

**********************************
You can’t always see them,
but the costs of your sin
are greater than you think!

**********************************


Satan:
‘Why fight this costly battle when the costs of your impurity are so minimal?’


The truth:
You can’t always see them, but the costs of your sin are greater than you think.

Satan: ‘Why live in this high state of alert for the rest of your life? Give up now, and I’ll leave you alone.’
The truth: Satan just might keep his word and leave you alone, but even if he did, the laws of reaping and sowing would still exact their payment from you. You cannot avoid the costs of sexual impurity. You need to fight.

Satan: ‘You’ll be awkward in business situations now, especially with women. You won’t fit in, and you’ll lose business.’


The truth:
No, you won’t be awkward in business situations. You’ll be more at ease than ever.