Light in a Cruel World

From the book Healing is a Choice by Steve Arterburn

Everything in my world changed while waiting to board a flight to
Colorado Springs for a dinner with a wonderful ministry couple. I was one of
the last to board the plane.  As I stood
on the ramp just about to walk through a curved doorway into the plane, my
phone rang.  I flipped it open, put it
to my ear, said hello, and after a short conversation said good-bye to the life
I had known.  My life changed in an
instant’nothing would ever be the same again. 
I will sum it up by saying it was on that call I discovered my wife and
I were going to be divorced.  Although
this article is not about my divorce and subsequent recovery, I can’t write
about suffering and healing without telling a portion of my journey back from
the depths of despair.

People often say they felt numb at difficult times in their lives.  There was nothing numb about my
experience.  My stomach began to ache;
my face flushed as a thick, dark curtain seemed to close in my mind.  I was dizzy and nauseated as I fell into my
seat.  The plane’s door slammed shut
behind me, and I began to breathe heavily to keep myself calm.  I once had experienced a panic attack and
feared the embarrassment of another attack. 
I did what I could to keep it together. 
Tears began to tumble into my lap as I turned toward the window and
wanted to run, but it was too late.  We
were already taxiing out to the runway. 
I needed to talk to someone but I was shut off from everyone. Anger,
dread, fear, and disgust swept through me as never before.

The ugly reality of divorce began to sink in as I imagined the
catastrophe of the outcome.  I hurt for
our daughter Madeline and how this would cause her unimaginable pain.  I was certain I had written my last book and
that everything else I loved doing was over. 
I have never felt so alone in such close proximity to so many
people. 

As I stated earlier, however, this article is about more than just my
divorce.  It’s about your divorce or
your loss or your abuse or your abandonment. 
It’s about the disgust you’ve felt at whatever cruelty had been thrust
upon you.  It’s about the isolation
you’ve felt from abandonment by people who looked nice to the outside world but
who were monsters to you at home.  It’s
also about the abuse or neglect you have given others.  It’s about the shattered dreams and lost
hopes that you’re living with right now. 
This article is about your healing and the choices you have to make to
experience the healing God has for you.

Are you ready to make those choices? 
There is so much light available for your life’so much healing’ and so
many people who would love to see you through this dark or difficult time.  I pray you will join us at our next New Life Weekend‘that you will take a brave step to heal.  Jesus asked the paralytic in John chapter five if he wanted to be
well. Today I ask you to same question. 
If your answer is yes, then I encourage you to call 1-800-NEW-LIFE right now–the phone lines are open 24 hours a day.

I can do all things through
Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13