New Life Live: June 12, 2014

Topics: DatingParentingWeight LossChristian WalkSexual AddictionCross-dressingBoundaries
Hosts: Steve Arterburn, Guest Hosts Marilyn Meberg and Shannon Ethridge

Caller Questions:

  1. I have been dating a girl who is 10yrs younger, how can we connect emotionally and spiritually moving forward? 
  2. How do I help my 10yo son manage his emotional attachment to food? 
  3. Why did my asthma come back after being healed years ago? 
  4. It is too late to save my marriage, but I am so grateful for Every Man’s Battle and Sustained Victory helping me with my addiction! 
  5. Should I object to my daughter inviting a cross-dresser to style hair at her wedding? 
  6. What boundaries should I set for my husband in mid-life crisis? 

Suggested Resources:
Is This The One
How We Love Our Kids
Healing Is a Choice
7 Minute Marriage Solution

Subscribe to the NEW LIFE LIVE Podcast via iTunes or streaming audio from Stitcher, the Smart Radio App.



  1. ann June 12, 2014 at 2:16 pm - Reply

    Dear Joann, your husband has disrespected you enough at least one would think. It’s time for you to get on with your life and let your husband go on with his mid-life crisis which by the way is unfair that he keeps blaming you for his disappointments. I pray you seek help for yourself and get your life and your spirit together, trust me, God will take care of him just as he will of you. STOP allowing this man to disrespect you and walk all over you and use you. You have a right to stand up for yourself and to respect yourself no matter where he’s living. Please, please, please stop accepting this from this man he’s using you in such a bad way, and for the record God did not intend for you to continue being disrespecting and stepped all over like an outside rug. Just being honest. I will pray for you. And by the way, your son is 19, he should be able to take care of himself so that you could find employment to start caring for yourself. The change starts with you. Think about it.

  2. Arlene Gautier June 12, 2014 at 2:53 pm - Reply

    Can you tell me what the beliefs of you’re church are. What is the denomination of this church.

    • Pat June 15, 2014 at 12:32 am - Reply

      It’s the Jesus denomination Arlene. If you believe in Jesus and why he came, then you are a Christian. There are no denominations in the Bible. People created denominations (differences) so they hold no weight. Christians believe what Jesus taught, which isn’t killing others like the Muslims have no problem doing, or praying to idols, and confessing to the middleman, as the Catholics are taught. Jesus taught us to have a direct relationship with God through Him. Other people have created other beliefs in order to take your money and control people.

  3. Martina Espinoza June 12, 2014 at 5:20 pm - Reply

    Hello! why is it that since I was a child I have always felt neglected, blamed, unloved, uncared for by Mom and the rest of the family? When all I’ve tried to be is good to people, I’m giving, helpful, thoughtful, caring, ready to be of service for each and every one who needs a helping hand? I feel unwanted, unimportant to every single person that has come across my life. I do not have 1 friend in my life. My family has disowned me because I seperated from my husband, now x husband, yet he still part of my family he still has family gatherings with them and I feel that he being a Pastor shouldn’t he feel some kind of guilt instead of being ok with the way the family situation is? Does God have a purpose for me that is why I am alone in this WORLD. I do have my three adult son’s and my Fiance that mean the world to me but I am still a little confused as to why someone can be so rejected and can’t even seem to keep any relationships. God Bless You!

  4. Marcia June 12, 2014 at 6:09 pm - Reply

    Dear Joanne, my heart goes out to you and your difficult situation. Despite other issues that may have occurred in the marriage, at this point your husband disrespects you because he knows that you will still take care of him. Please follow the hosts advice and find a counselor to help you each step of the way to a better situation. It’s time for your husband to learn that he cannot expect to be taken care of if he does not respect you. Based on what you shared, that may mean that you will need to seek employment outside of the home so that you are not financially dependent upon him. Undoubtedly taking these steps will be painful, but keep firm boundaries – don’t cook for him, do his laundry, etc if he verbally abuses you. You are a caring, loving person who deserves respect. Remember, God commands husbands to love their wives. God has never intended for wives to be treated as dishrags or indentured servants. When your husband understands that he gets nothing until he treats you respect, then he will eventally (after some fits and protests) treat you with more respect, or decide to leave.

    • Joann June 13, 2014 at 6:42 pm - Reply

      Thank you so very much. I am still having such a hard time with this situation, and it means so much to me to have nice people sympathize with me because a lot of the time I feel so confused and guilty.

  5. ann June 13, 2014 at 10:07 am - Reply

    Martina, you seem to have a loving family of your own with your Fiancé’ and sons don’t over look their love and care for you. be unbothered that your family has (as you put it) disown you, it’s their lost not yours. Don’t stop living on the here say’s, make the best of the life you have with your fiancé’ and sons life is too short to concerned about what other people are thinking or saying about, no matter if it’s mother, father, sister, brother don’t allow yourself to be unhappy because of them, they’re the ones that are unhappy and they are just playing on your spirit and your dignity. Keep it moving and do pray for them but do not entertain their foolishness. Once you let go of that you’ll begin to attract more positive and caring people in your life and surrounding. Trust me, try it and see what happens. Blessings to you.

  6. ann June 16, 2014 at 12:03 pm - Reply

    Dear Joann, like I said before the healing starts with you. If you want God to do something for you you have to do something for me and that’s to let go of situation that is slowly killing you, you cannot do anything about it until you let it go. I will continue praying for you but again it will begin when you let go.

  7. ann June 17, 2014 at 8:24 am - Reply

    Sorry Joann, I was so excited to hear from you I was typing as fast as my thoughts came to mind. I meant to say, if you want God to do something for you you must do something for him and that’s to let go and get out of his way. Yes, the healing does begin with you but only when you let go of the very thing you cannot handle, trust me, God will change things for the better in your life, may not happen over night but please believe me it will happen and when it does your heart is going to flow with happiness, smiles, and joy! please trust me on that.

    • Joann June 17, 2014 at 1:18 pm - Reply

      Ann, thank you again. I am doing the best that I can, although it is so hard. I know I am codependent, and that makes me second-guess myself constantly. I always said I wish God would send an angel down and tell me exactly what I should do, and then I would do it KNOWING it was the right thing. It is the uncertainty that makes this so hard. I appreciate your comments. It helps so much to know that other people are supporting me. I want to heal myself so completely that this never happens to me again. I will be 46 next month, and that is just way too old to have to be starting over. But if that’s what it takes to heal myself, and if I can be sure that I am doing the right thing in the process, then that’s what I will do.

  8. ann June 18, 2014 at 11:29 am - Reply

    Joann, please follow your heart, it seems you are headed in the right direction. I think you moving forward with getting out of this will be the best thing for your life.

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