New Life Live: April 22, 2016

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From the Archives of New Life Live, This Show Originally Aired April 28, 2004

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Topics: Narcissists, Weight Loss, Intimacy, Alcohol, Marriage, Christian Walk

Hosts: Steve Arterburn, Dr. John Townsend, Dr. Henry Cloud

Caller Questions:

  1. What are the characteristics of a narcissistic personality?
  2. Do you have resources to understand food addiction as it relates to men?
  3. Would God ever allow me to be released from my empty marriage?
  4. There is no love in my marriage because my wife hates my spending and not paying attention to her.
  5. How do I discipline myself to read my Bible and pray every day?

Suggested Resources:
Changes That Heal  (option for How People Grow)
Lose It for Life
Boundaries in Marriage
Every Man’s Marriage

Subscribe to the NEW LIFE LIVE Podcast via iTunes or streaming audio from Stitcher, the Smart Radio App.

New Life Live: January 22, 2016

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From the Archives of New Life Live, This Show Originally Aired January 12, 2004

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Topics: Lust, Marriage, Teens, Parenting, Physical Abuse, Depression, Pornography
Hosts: Steve Arterburn, Dr. John Townsend, Dr. Henry Cloud

Caller Questions:

  1. My husband denies anything is wrong with him looking at other women’s bodies.
  2. I resent how my husband has taken me for granted all these years; is it my fault for not saying anything?
  3. As a single parent, how do I talk to my 12yo and 14yo boys about sex and dating?
  4. Should I leave or stay with my physically-abusive husband of 3yrs? I married him because of our child.
  5. My husband struggles with porn; will he change if his accountability group is too accepting?

Suggested Resources:

Download the Tip Sheet – 13 Steps To Successful Dating
How To Have That Difficult Conversation   (newer version of Boundaries Face to Face)
Boundaries in Marriage
Every Young Man’s Battle
Preparing Your Son for Every Man’s Battle

Subscribe to the NEW LIFE LIVE Podcast via iTunes or streaming audio from Stitcher, the Smart Radio App.

USS Matrimony

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. James 4:10

USS Matrimony

Marital adjustment is a simple matter. Before marriage, you command your ship of life based upon the personal convictions of one person–you. After marriage you board the USS Matrimony. You are now dealing with the personal convictions of two people. It’s something you must quickly learn to deal with.

Humility is essential to create and maintain unity on board. It requires a mind-set that honors your partner.

So, what’s riding on this? Quite a lot–namely, oneness and intimacy. If you learn the art of servant-leadership, the sailing on the USS Matrimony will be much smoother.

Yes, you may have a compliant spouse who’ll tolerate your less than humble ways. But in such cases, outer calmness is usually the result of an inner deadness in the marital relationship, not oneness and intimacy.

Without a humble spirit and a willingness to serve one another, you may have peace, you may have marital longevity, and you may even appear to have a marriage made in heaven. But you won’t have a relationship based on intimacy, there will be road-side wounded, if not casualties, along the way.

I can’t urge you strongly enough in your marriage to commit yourselves to a life of humbly serving your spouse.

– Steve Arterburn

Marriage is a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters in prose.” – Beverly Nichols (1898–1983)

New Life Live: June 11, 2015

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Topics: Grief, Sexual Integrity, Marriage, Affairs, Dating, Trust, Boundaries
Hosts: Steve Arterburn, Dr. Sheri Keffer, Milan Yerkovich

Caller Questions:

  1. Comment: I was touched by what you said about grieving a pet and it was exactly what I needed today.
  2. My husband still wants me after I found him with another woman; what do I do?
  3. How do I trust my boyfriend after finding out he was not fully honest with me?
  4. What boundaries can I place with my husband when he speaks down to me?

Suggested Resources:
Healing Is a Choice
Is This The One
Boundaries in Marriage

Here is the Women in the Battle workshop testimony Steve read on the radio today:

Before coming to WITB, I was full of fear and anxiety about my situation and my future. I felt really unworthy and lost. I would have moments of empowerment, but the anger, sadness, and terror would resurface and take me out. This workshop has been such an essential part of my healing. I no longer feel isolated and ashamed. I feel empowered again as a woman. If my husband stays in recovery and we stay married, great. But if he doesn’t choose to stay in recovery, I know that I will be okay. I am a winner either way. Leaving WITB I have a stronger relationship in Christ and a fundamental belief that I am worthy. – Carole

Subscribe to the NEW LIFE LIVE Podcast via iTunes or streaming audio from Stitcher, the Smart Radio App.

New Life Live: June 5, 2015

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Topics: Adult Children, Marriage, Boundaries, Divorce, Marriage
Hosts: Steve Arterburn, Dr. Jill Hubbard, Milan Yerkovich

Caller Questions:

  1. My husband may be done with our relationship if I attend my son’s wedding; what should I do?
  2. Is it OK for me to not want to meet with my bio dad who is trying to contact me?
  3. Would attending a Healing Is a Choice weekend benefit me after divorce?
  4. I think I married too soon; should I seek an annulment?

Suggested Resources:
How We Love
Forgiving our Fathers and Mothers
Healing Is a Choice

Subscribe to the NEW LIFE LIVE Podcast via iTunes or streaming audio from Stitcher, the Smart Radio App.

Husband as the Source in Marriage

There is a lot of discussion over interpretation of words like “submission” and “headship” in marriage, so I chose the word “source” to describe the role of the man in marriage.  What does seeing the husband as the “source” mean to you? Watch the video for more!

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Marriage

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. – Genesis 2:24

Marriage

How can a stranger tell if two people are married? When eight-year old Derrick was asked this question he stopped to think for a minute. Then he replied most seriously, ‘You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.’

Kids really have a way of making us laugh, reflect, and, yes. . . sometimes yell, don’t they? But young Derrick hit upon a very important fact: marriage can be tough and that’s true regardless of whether or not you have kids.

Finances, communication, intimacy, and sometimes-even kids can become sources of tension in your relationship with your spouse. Nevertheless, God’s intention for marriage is that it be a source of joy, encouragement, comfort, and grace that gives richness to life.

Steve Arterburn

‘Marriage is the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, making in all, two.’ – Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914)

Transform your Marriage

Transform your Marriage

Could your childhood be a stumbling block in your marriage?

Milan and Kay Yerkovich are two great counselors who enthusiastically share their journey as a couple. The first 15 years of their marriage were difficult. They weren’t sure why, until they journeyed back to their childhoods and discovered differences that were driving a wedge between them. Theirs is an amazing story of transformation that could illuminate struggles in your own life. I think you’ll find this video incredibly helpful. Click on the image below to watch.

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Divorce Proof your Marriage

Divorce Proof Your Marriage

Divorce is an all-too-common reality in our society. How can we protect our marriages? Dr. Dave Stoop has a few simple methods to keep couples together, and there are even studies to prove they work. Click the image below for the answer to how to divorce-proof your marriage!

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What’s Different about this Marriage Weekend

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On the radio today, Steve Arterburn mentioned Dave Stoop’s blog article about our Marriage Weekend. You can read that here.  Find out about our Marriage Solution Weekend.