Life often seems unfair, doesn’t it? Because of this many men conclude God is unreasonable in his demands. This is what a man named Job thought. As you probably remember Job was a man who lost his all of his children, his wealth, his health, and his reputation.
In the midst of his suffering, Job cried, ‘How frail is humanity! How short is life, and how full of trouble! Like a flower, we blossom for a moment and then wither. Like the shadow of passing cloud, we quickly disappear. Must you keep an eye on such a frail creature and demand an accounting from me? Who can create purity in one born impure?’ (Job 14:1-4).
That’s a good question’one that most of us have asked in one form or another. Job persisted in his questioning because deep inside he believed God to be good, even though he was suffering terribly. He was honest with his emotions and questions, but he never stopped seeking God.
Are you suffering? Have you lost someone you love? Have you received bad news from the doctor? Lost your home or job? While working through the pain and unfairness of life, you may have to be satisfied with trusting God, even though you simply don’t understand. But be assured’if you trust God and seek him in the hard times, your good Father will respond with blessing and faith.
As men, we’re called to speak into chaos. But our words must be both wise and well placed in order to offer any aspect of redemption. Consider Job’s friends. When tragedy struck, they were simply incredible. For seven days they were present with Job’comforting and grieving with him.
But when they began offering counsel, the situation soured. I think the foolishness of Job’s friends were expressed in four faces, and I think these four faces of folly still tempt us today. See if you can resonate with them.
Face Number One:Personal suffering always has a clear reason. Job’s friends were convinced that if somebody’s life is messed up, then there’s a clearly identifiable cause close at hand. After all, trouble doesn’t come out of nowhere.
Face Number Two:Good guys always prosper. Job’s friends were sure that, if you walked with God, you’d receive your just rewards in this life.
Face Number Three:Bad guys always roast. Job’s friends believed evil always meets judgment in this life.
Face Number Four:If you’re suffering, it’s because you’ve sinned. Job’s friends had ideas about suffering that caused them to needlessly kick Job when he was down.
Men, do you have a friend who’s suffering? If so, take care that your words bring comfort to the situation. Don’t let the example of Job’s friends scare you into silence. Just keep in mind that your best guess as to the reason for your friend’s suffering may well be wide of the mark.
Guys, have you ever noticed that when a woman is feeling stressed or angry, she’ll often call a friend? Have you also noticed when guys feel those same things, we usually do just the opposite?
When it comes to dealing with emotions, most men run for the hills’alone. We tend not to be as good as our female counterparts at facing our feelings, let alone talking about them. Most of us have been trained to treat our emotions like dirty laundry ‘ we don’t want anything to do with them.
When our emotions surface, our internal ‘Sweeper’ moves to action. The sweeper is that part of our subconscious who methodically and logically eliminates the threat that rogue emotions present. The ‘Sweeper’s’ job is to prohibit any situation from heating up too much and to sweep stray emotions back under the surface, where we think they belong. The Sweeper’s job description looks something like this:
Hide and mask anger
Withdraw in the face of hard truth
Push others away
Excuse me from feeling the hurts of others
Men, does this sound familiar? If so, I think it’s time you put your Sweeper up for review, and seriously consider cleaning out his office. The ‘Sweeper’s’ so-called services are, in fact, doing you a great disservice.