Every Man’s Battle Scholarship testimony

Ed wrote to us about his experience prior to attending the Every Man’s Battle intensive:

I was listening to Christian radio on my lunch break and responded to an advertisement for Every Man’s Battle. I spoke to Debra, initially I was hesitant to discuss why I was interested in Every Man’s Battle with a woman, however five minutes into the conversation assured me that this would be no ordinary conversation.

I have struggled with porn since my adolescent years and in my desperation for healing I reached out to New Life with very limited resources and no money. I had no confidence that this would work out for me. I expressed my desire to go to Debra and the barriers that would prevent me from going, Debra’s response to it all was “let’s pray about it”. “Are you kidding me?” was my initial response, in surprise that Debra would take the time out to not only pray but submit a prayer that would have a huge impact on me going forward.

After receiving financial assistance from New Life everything started to work against me going to this conference. I didn’t receive holiday pay for Thanksgiving Day and the following Friday. The rim on my car cracked forcing me to ride on my spare tire and I was thinking this conference will have to wait till next year. I don’t even have the money to fix this rim and I may be out of a job come Friday, there is absolutely, positively, no way I am attending Every Man’s Battle with all of these issues. I thought of a way to break this to Debra that would reflect my appreciation for her work in helping me attend the conference. I can see now that I underestimated Debra and the power of God.

Tuesday night was a night I shall never forget. I couldn’t sleep because the Holy Spirit kept telling me to take a picture of your spare tire on your car along with your bank statement and send it to Debra(tears in my eyes as i write this). I thought to myself,” I’m not exposing myself to a stranger and put my business out there”.  Then the Holy Spirit reminded me of the beautiful prayer that Debra offered on our initial phone call and how I had felt that for the first time, someone is partnering with me and my recovery to the point that it allowed me to be transparent with my financial issues . . .  admitting that I didn’t have the funds, and even worse, emailing a bank statement that showed I had less than $50.00 in the bank. I didn’t feel the shame that I had anticipated (sorry I am crying trying to type this email), and that’s when a voice spoke to me and said, “that’s how you know that you will receive your healing from this conference”.  That is when I knew that God had ordained and constructed all the events leading me to this conference.

I am so grateful for New Life. You will be in my journal along with Debra, whom I shall never forget. I love a savior whom I have never seen, and I love Debra who I have not seen (excuse my grammar; this is by far the most emotional letter I have written to anyone I didn’t know.).  After years of shame and struggle, I am attending Every Man’s Battle because God’s children responded to his guidance, and I am blessed. The best way I can describe this feeling (more tears, sorry) is to imagine having a 100lb weight attached to you by a chain that you had to drag around for 49 years. Now imagine God opening a door and saying, “this is how you get rid of the chain and weight”.  I have been waiting all my life to find a way to get rid of this weight; drugs, sex, and alcohol only exacerbated the problem and lied to me after promising a way out. I thank all of you from the most honest place within my heart and will write to you all after I attend the conference. I am going to Every Man’s Battle. I am walking in freedom. I can see liberty.

Listen to Ed’s experience after the intensive when he called to share his testimony on radio.