Who’s in Control?

Do not let sin control the way you live; do not give in to sinful desires. – Romans 6:12

Anger management is an illusion of power; that is, it’s your illusion that you can get your anger under wraps by “managing” the symptoms. It might seem like semantics, but the goal is to be able to control—not manage— your anger by treating it before the symptoms present. Control begins long before the feeling arises within you. Control is recognizing that the circumstances that lead you to “lose it” aren’t the problem; your unresolved issues that inform your reaction to those circumstances are the problem.

You might have good reason to be angry. Perhaps you have been betrayed, experienced a great loss, or been treated horribly or unfairly. Maybe you have shame and guilt from sin in your life, and you try to stay “safe” behind the rage. Anger begins to surface when people are at their most vulnerable, and sometimes the anger is uglier than the original offense. Turning the focus on healing and resolving your internal struggles can enable you to use anger in a productive way.

Anger is not a sin, but in your anger, you can give in to sin. You can be swept away by the driving force and overreact, making poor decisions that can alter your life and relationships.

How can you take control of your anger? Begin by acknowledging that anger has controlled you long enough.

Release the root cause of your anger through prayer and counseling. Surrender to God the wrongs done to you. Grieve the losses and look for resolution and healing from the pain. Begin to recognize patterns of your anger; for example, perhaps when you are pressed for time or feel external stresses, anger flares easily. Be committed to finding healthy ways to control and express your anger.

As long as you live on earth, you won’t see the end of injustices. Yet God desires for you to let go of injustices and hold on to His grace. Only He can give you the power to forgive those who have hurt you the deepest. – Paul Chappell

A Christian will find it cheaper to pardon than to resent. Forgiveness saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred, the waste of spirits. – Hannah More

For Further Reflection
Proverbs 16:32; Nahum 1:3; Matthew 12:33–37

TODAY’S PRAYER
Lord, forgive my sin and help me to have control of the anger within and to resolve any wound, betrayal, fear, or threat. Help me to trust you to right the wrongs and to lead me in the way of understanding. Help me to use anger for good and not allow it to use me for evil. In your name I pray, Amen.